The Five Realities of Family Life
we can have the great family life we’ve always dreamed of

Reality # 1: It’s easier than we think.
Many of us spend time and money doing things that don’t really matter and we often miss the opportunity to do the little things that make all the difference. What we remember most fondly from our childhood days are not the lavish birthday parties or the expensive gifts, but the simple family events that are repeated over and over again. And that’s why traditions are so powerful. Children and adults alike find comfort in knowing something is going to happen they are sure they will enjoy. And the beauty of it is, it’s less work for us. We don’t have to come up with new and different things to do or eat every time we get together. We can plan the same activities, use the same decorations, and prepare the same food as we did last year, because it’s what our family really wants. How easy is that? Can you imagine the fuss if you tried to change the Thanksgiving menu, cancel the Easter egg hunt or replace the Christmas stockings your family has enjoyed for years?

Reality # 2: It’s never too late to get started.
It’s never too late to get started building family ties, even if your children are already grownup. Creating family ties is an ongoing, forever evolving process. There is no beginning and no end. We just keep making it better. You can easily start with your grown-up children, your grandchildren, or your nieces and nephews. Grandparents, especially, have so much to offer their grandchildren: time, patience, wisdom, and a special kind of love. Establishing family traditions and strengthening family ties, with anyone, at any age, is a wonderful gift to give.

Reality #3: Families come in all shapes and sizes.
Some of us are lucky enough to be born into a big extended family, rich in history and tradition. Most of us are not. And we often watch these families with envy, wishing we had one like that. Sometimes we think we can’t have it because we are single, divorced, without children, or because we live far from our “real” family. You don’t have to be the perfect traditional family to feel like a family. There are single parent families, and spread-across-the-country families who are very close, and seemingly “perfect” families that are totally disconnected. It’s not about “who” your family is, it’s about “what” you do together.

Reality # 4: You can create the kind of family life you want.
You don’t have to drift along, hoping it will happen. There are many things you can do to steer your family in the right direction. Some people think you can’t force “these things”, and they are right. You can’t force it. You can, however, plant the seeds, add a little fertilizer and nurture it along. It is definitely possible to plan for and create the kind of family you want. You just have to understand how it works You may not be able to make your children continue a tradition you learned from your grandmother, but you can certainly introduce new ones that suit your family’s interests and repeat those they seem to enjoy.

Reality # 5: You already know what to do.
Most of us have an instinctive sense about what it takes to create family ties. We all take photos…hundreds of photos. How about saving our children’s things, the baby blanket, the worn-out stuffed bear, the school papers, and the baby teeth? No one tells us to do these things, we just do them. We also plan lots of holiday celebrations and family get-togethers and we’re always searching for ways to make our loved ones feel special. We simply do these things because we know in our hearts how important they are… just like the instinct we have to create a warm, cozy, inviting home that our family will feel good in.

The biggest problem for most of us is time. Our modern, hectic lifestyles don’t leave us the time to sit down to dinner and talk, let alone organize memories and keepsakes in the powerful ways that can bring our families closer. Putting our photos into albums is probably one of the things we feel the most guilty about not doing. Our instincts are right on because family photos are incredibly powerful in the way they can strengthen family bonds. They help us remember what we want to remember from the past. The things we keep and the photos we choose to put into albums represent the best of times…events and periods of our lives that felt good to us.

When we look back at them, we often remember these times as even better than we thought they were at the time. How many of you have experienced your children looking at photos from a vacation trip you remember was filled with bickering and complaining; yet, your children, looking at these photos months or years later, reminisce about how much fun it was. We remember these events as good because we want them to be. It’s that simple. And the reason we all take so many photos is because we instinctively know this. That is why organizing photos and keepsakes, in ways our families can share and enjoy, is so very important.

Say NO to today’s dizzybusy lifestyle and get back to the basics of a simple, joyful, meaningful life. It’s not about doing more. It’s about doing less and doing the right things. The happyhome habits are based on the five “protective factors” decades of research has shown families need to be strong, connected and happy. Visit the happyhome club online and join the thousands of families who are experiencing the powerful difference these simple habits can make in their lives. Take part in the life-changing happyhome challenge and earn free products that will enrich your family life at home...because happyhomes don’t just happen.

Lorle Campos, CEO/Founder of Once Upon a Family, is the author of happyhome: a family's guide to finding balance in a dizzybusy world. Take part in the happyhome Challenge to receive free tools and products to enrich your family life at home.